Welcome back to the Hawthorn DITFTR! Last time Jeans and Ocean were born, Dianne caught on to Jacaranda sleeping with her sister, Dianne divorced Jacaranda, Jacaranda married Alecia, and Dianne used ghosts as therapy.
Jeans: “Daddy left your mama for my Mama!”
Ocean: “I’m going to shove this block down your throat if you don’t shut up.”
Navy: “No death threats till after lunch!”
Ocean: “I didn’t threaten to kill him. It’s not my fault if the block happens to choke him to death.”
I’d say the kids are taking the situation well.
After the toddlers finished discussing murder, it was time for more toddler training. Dianne continues to pretend that Jacaranda isn’t in the room.
Once they finish there’s a bit of a toddler swap and Dianne flees like the room is on fire.
Really Lilac, you have to destroy the nice bench outside.
Lilac: “DESTRUCTION!”
I think it’s interesting how both of Dianne’s kids ended up with green hair and blue eyes.
Lilac had a birthday. She is now very fluffy.
Burglar alert.
Burglar: “THEY HAVE AN ALARM!!! THE ROBBERS ASSOCIATION DIDN’T PREPARE ME FOR THIS!!!”
Police Officer: “You are under arrest you piece of filth!”
Burglar: “Aw man, there goes my robbing streak.”
In the morning it’s baby time!
Alecia: “WHAT IS THAT INFERNAL SQUEAKING???”
That’s just Lilac, she’s finally big enough to use the toys I bought her.
Alecia: “IT IS DRIVING ME MENTAL!!!”
Anyways, Alecia welcomes another boy into the family. Meet Solar Panel, he’s Perceptive and a Slob. Seriously why are so many of these kids Slobs?
Lilac: “INTRUDER. INTRUDER.”
Mail Lady: “Uh, nice doggy?”
Lilac: “I should rip you to shreds.”
Mail Lady: “I’m out of here!”
Ash: “Who’s a good dog?”
Lilac: “I AM. I AM!”
Ash, stop encouraging Lilac’s misbehaviors.
Oh great, who puked on the floor.
Maid: “I’m not cleaning it up.”
THEN WHAT ARE YOU BEING PAID FOR?!
Anyways, Alecia is back at the drafting table.
And now time for Navy’s birthday!
Jacaranda: “There is a trail of flowers on my floor.”
Blame Dianne, she leaves them everywhere.
Anyways, Navy is now a Night Owl.
Ash got invited to Crocus’ party. You’d think his children would learn their lesson about inviting him places.
Crocus spent the entire time playing with the VR googles anyway.
Ash: “Hello pretty lady. Judging by that baby I’m guessing you’re married.”
Sandy: “Nope, you would think so, but I just can’t seem to keep a man
Ash: “What kind of party doesn’t have any food being served? I’m stuck with this crappy bowl of cereal.”
Dianne: “The audacity! You two are really going to rub this in my face?”
Alecia and Jacaranda: *kissing noises*
Jacaranda: “I’m no longer feeling having a dog.”
Lilac: “I’m being sent away?”
Sorry Lilac, it’s for the generational goals.
And so the social worker came and took Lilac away.
Navy was out fishing in the rain throughout all of this.
Navy: “It wasn’t raining when I started.”
With Lilac gone, Jacaranda has adopted a horse, he’s called Bonkers and he’s Friendly.
Ash: “Being a grandparent is so wonderful. This is the cutest baby ever.”
Ocean: “Bastard. What about me?”
Jeans: “What about me?”
Ocean: “I’m clearly cuter than you.”
Bonkers is living off of grass cause I didn’t bother buying any horse supplies.
Ash: “I am the king of video games!”
Ash: “How would you like to sleep with the king of video games? It’s not an opportunity that comes along very often.”
Alecia: “Are you serious?”
Ash: “I know, it’s every woman’s dream come true and it’s all for you.”
Alecia: “I would not sleep with you if you were the last man alive!”
Alecia: “And to top it off, what is wrong with you proposition your DAUGHTER IN-LAW!!!”
Ash: “So you’re not going to sleep with me?”
Alecia: “NO!!!”
Navy: “I want to have so many animals when I grow up!”
Ash: “I’m a grandfather… THAT MEANS I’M OLD!!!!”
So you’ve finally clued in.
Navy: “I love you so much Grandpa, I don’t know why Dad thinks you were such a bad father.”
Ash: “I’M OOOOOOOOOOLD!!!!”
Navy: “Uh, Grandpa? You okay? Do you need pills or something?”
Navy: “Grandpa wouldn’t stop screaming about being old, so I’m just going to play video games.”
Bonkers ran out of puddles to drink from so I had to by a water trough.
Ash: “I may be old, but I still look hot don’t I baby girl?”
Ocean: “You have wrinkles bigger than my mouth.”
In other news…
Dianne has mastered the logic skill.
Jacaranda has reached level 5 of the Culinary career.
So he joins up in the Business career which doesn’t require any skills.
Alecia has only been to half a day of work as a stylist, but she’s been working her butt off on the drafting table.
Jacaranda’s been slacking a little on his LTW lately, but he’s slowly chugging through the writing skill whenever he has time.
Looks like the final baby is on the way!
It’s also time for Solar Panel’s birthday!
He’s got Liam’s blue eyes, and his hair is from Alecia’s mother.
Alecia gets started on toddler training almost immediately.
Navy: “Do you ever get the feeling that our family is weird?”
Ocean: “Our stepmother is also our aunt and our paternal uncles and aunt all have different mothers.”
Ash: “What am I doing back in this craphole?”
You mean the festival that you used to go to all the time?
Ash: “It’s not what it used to be.”
Ash: “I’m going to blow this shit up.”
Those are fireworks.
I didn’t realize that the fireworks exploded with a rainbow until just now.
DID YOU JUST EAT A FLY???
Jacaranda: “If I consume a thousand souls I get superpowers.”
Ash: “I feel like I’m forgetting something.”
Your son’s birthday maybe. Jacaranda is now an adult.
Dianne finishes one final job.
And she reaches the top of the ghost hunting profession! Which means her lifetime wish is complete.
Ash: “I’m tired of that woman living here for free without even sleeping with me.”
So you lock her in the bedroom?
Ash: “I even left some food in there this time.”
The food being a jellybean bush.
Dianne: “My butt feels oddly warm.”
Dianne: “OH SHIT! I’M ON FIRE!!!!!”
And like that Dianne is nothing more than a pile of ash.
Grim Reaper: “What is with this family and killing the mothers of their children?”
Grim Reaper: “Are you going to come quietly or are you going to scream like a baby?”
Dianne: “At least this way I won’t have to watch my sister bang my ex-husband.”
Grim Reaper: “Aw. Who’s a cute cat?”
On that note, it’s time for the story progression updates.
It seems when Marco and Crocus split up they each got custody of one child. Garth lives with Marco and Michel with Crocus.
Remember Sandy Cho, while one of the men she bounces between is Aster.
Crocus has started dating Hasan Colby for a second time.
Ash wanted 10 grandkids, so I pollinated Foxglove,
Hyacinth,
and Crocus with kids. Story Progression doesn’t seem to be giving same sex couples kids right now for some reason.
Generational Goals:
Gain skill level 5 for job (each one that requires different skill)
Start Four Jobs, Quit when At Level Five 2/4
Meet Co-Workers 2/4Have Kid with two different woman 2/2Get Married
Flirt with at least three sims 2/3
Expansion Need: Pets
Buy and get rid of pets (one cat, one dog, one horse) 1/3
Kids: 4/5
Heir: #5
That’s all for now!